China Town

Back in Greece, working at a Chinese Restaurant (yeah i know.. wtf)...
All of the tourists are pretty much scandinavian and i have compiled a list of facts and observations just for you:

1. Scand women cannot walk in heels.. even wedges.. it just looks.. tranvestite-ish.. ew
2. Never, EVER sniff tablecloths at chinese restaurants. no matter how compeled you are to do so!
3. Ive made friends with gay norwegian bikers who only ride harleys
4. I work across from leonidas (hes a waiter at an upscale resto opposite china palace)
5. it takes a lot to get scands to smile
6. I got searched by the cops and almost went to jail cus i didnt have an id on me, but luckily they didnt ask me for it so i escaped..
7. my little brothers favorite animal is a chicken. (he is 3.5 yrs old)
8. ive eaten maybe 30 fortune cookies and they seem to be very certain that i will make good friends at the next party i go to.

so friends, this is all for now. boyfie is good, i saw my ex randomly.. he looked like a deer in headlights... lame
its still too cold to wear shorts or jumpers which i am frustrated about.
i need a bikini
and
i am extra tired sooo good resting friends

Useless

Useless things:
1. Pagers
2. Paper grocery bags
3. Plastic knives
4. Shutter Glasses. As modeled by Kanye West
5. Kanye West, as modeled by Kanye West
6. Celery
7. Angry blogging.. my last post is jokes
8. tweens
9. MINI FRIDGES (DONT WORK)
10. kitchen sponges (its like washing your plates with poop)
11. nail polish bottle shapes.. (you will never get that last bit of polish out the bottom)
12. fingerless gloves!
13. plastic spatulas (they MELT.... USELESSSSS!!)
14. nipple stickers
15. finger puppets
16. Sticky Tack.. doesnt stick. GAY
17. this list
18. Goldfish. completely disloyal, AND UNPETABLE
19. the silicon packages in your purses and shoes. Theyre there.. waiting for you to eat them.
20. BODY JEWELS.. not pretty
21. hair mascara


freezer burnt pizza pockets.. are NOT useless to my surprise.. kindof like a pizza Popsicle :)


umm im too tired to think of more and not as creative as i would like to be.

Any suggestions? lol

Ice

Betrayal: Life's Sucker Punch- Intelligence, its bag of ice.
So.. go ahead and punch me as much as you want, cus i got a DAMN BIG bag of ice, and I aint gunna get bruised.

Ive said it before, there's no such thing as friends, just family

If you dont think the words best friend and brother are synonyms, you are in for a rude awakening.

not now, not tomorrow. But maybe the next day.
I am filled with such anger and yet such peace.
Ignorance is no bliss but a blindfold sure helps.

I am starting to make apologies, make amends

Something so small broke the straw, i am filled with a nausea that reflects my own inner mom.
"I told you so"
"I told you so"
"I told you so"

Megaphone

I

WANT

TO

BE

EXTRA

LOUD

RIGHT NOW!

Studying is getting the best of me.
all i can think of is sex and food.

Both are so close.. YET SO FAR :(

Grapples & Sex

Did you know they make Apples that taste like Grapes?

I saw them at the grocery store (They sell them at Metro, if you're curious), about a week ago.
I can't stop thinking about them.. so many questions come to my mind like

1. do they taste like Children Tylenol, or real grapes?

2. why would you be tempted to by an apple that tastes like a grape, when you can buy grapes that taste like grapes

3. Has anyone ever bought these?

4. Who is bored enough with their life to have to surprise themselves with grapples?

"I am craving an apple... oh, well look at that. it tastes like a grape. I think I'll become an astronaut. "

5. Does anyone else find interproduce relations gross?

Apples should not be having sex with grapes
and we should not be eating their mutant love child.
And what is making love?

my boyfriend said we dont make love, we have sex.
Well why the Fuck not?
I made him cry about it though.

i win. again.

Jackson Pollock

This might seem critical and judgmental.
But not every paint splatter is a work of art, right?

I'm an awkward painting.
I need to point out the bad so i can evolve from a paint-splatter.

into
something more legible.
I don't like Picassos.

BAD
1. Love Handles
2. Thin Hair. Boring.
3. inner thighs
4. Strange tan
5. Mean
6. Impatient
7. Lazy
8. Unemployed
9. Butt?
10. Perkier boobies please
11. Not a Ballerina
12. Not flexible enough.. yet
13. Selfish
14. Grumpy
15. Picky
16. Unmotivated
17. Weak
18. Too Proud
19. Too sensitive
20. Shy
21. Ugly Sneeze
22. Whiter Teeth
23. Always in the Background.
24. Educational Achievements wane

well now.
Harsh? Maybe.
But I have something to do
for the next 60/70 years,

while you sit around a knit.

Tiny Babies

I was looking for a job.
Mom drives me to high school, there is a nursery home next door.
My friends and I go inside, we find a room with tiny babies on display.
They are about the size of cabbage patch dolls, we think they are extra cute.

We hear a door opening and we know we are not supposed to be there.
My friends run to another room. I am stuck in the room with the tiny babies.
An old woman with white hair, sweet looking comes into the room and scolds me for being there.
She says people are not allowed in there because they can contaminate the air and asks me why i broke in.
I tell her not to worry, that I have siblings too and they are babies and I know how to take care of them.
She is still upset that I broke in, she makes me do volunteer work so she doesnt call the cops.

I feel trapped, I am missing my classes but I do not want my mother to find out that I was sneaking around into other people's houses so I just help her with her chores

I get excited because i have found a job, but then realize its not a real job, but maybe it will be good for experience

Zombies

Sometimes I honestly don't know what sort of information my brain can filter while I'm awake to produce such messed up imagery when I'm asleep.

Zombies.. really? I'm 18
they weren't scary.. they were just... there. doing zombie things

Maybe I will be posting more shortly.
The next one i remember most likely
stay tuned

im sick, its awfull.

i went to greece for winter break, had the best 3 weeks of my life.
i fell in love, but really fell in love

flirting isnt a sin, its just the only thing i have left
but other than that.
i love him
i want to be his
and no one elses. ever